Amendment
Alright, just a few things that I wanted to say. As an advance warning to all you whiners, this one goes on for a while. It’s probably going to be my longest blog.
“Froggie”, (the artist formerly known as “Bandit”) no offense if I give you a black rose. Or if I change my mind and I decide to leave a dead rat under your pillow.
I can’t believe that even my blogs which are supposed to be an outlet for my thinking are being censored too. I admit that I had been treading on thin ice but I was kind of enjoying that. Still, spoilsports are always there to dampen my fun. On the bright side, they can stop me from making mistakes.
LIMU! LIMU! LIMU!
“Powerpuff”, you’ve joined the whining ranks under the rule of “Hyper Dude”. I say to you the same thing I said to “Hyper Dude”. If my blogs are too long for you to read in one go, then you can either not read them or just read them in portions. Instead of whining about the problem, why don’t you ‘take the initiative’ (like “Hyper Dude” likes to say)? Figure out the solution! In case, you’re still stumped as to what the solution is, read the sentence starting from “If my blogs…” to “them in portions” again. Maybe that will give you a hint.
Ok, “Banana Man” had a fairly long blog devoted to an analysis of me. I don’t know why you did that but I really don’t mind. It’s kind of interesting knowing what you think of me since I always thought that on a deeper mental level, you and I were quite similar (I’m sure I’m going to hear a lot of dumb jokes about those last few words). I’m going to give you a few confirmations and a few quantifications of your words. I think you expected this but didn’t really want it. I’ll try not to assume anything on your behalf.
True, I don’t use MSN anymore (except on rare occasions) like many now know. I completely understand that people might prefer not to e-mail me, phone me or visit me in person. However, I don’t mind that. Sure, I receive phone calls from others for the simplest things which normally would be expressed over MSN but I still prefer the phone for such cases. People always judged me as one of those people who preferred MSN since I could express myself more freely that way. However, I like the personal touch that phone calls and meetings have, which written communications can’t provide.
You were right that we’re using our blogs to communicate most of the time. However, I have the impression that none of us are supposed to discuss our blogs in person. I don’t really know why, but it’s just a viewpoint that I hold. Even then, I’m often the person who brings up the other’s blog. Perhaps my viewpoint only applies to those who ruminate in their blogs rather than talk about day-to-day life.
I don’t know whether the whole thing “‘stinks’ of a man trying to understand what he is and why.”. I tend to do that sort of thinking personally, without letting the general public know. However, it’s entirely possible that you’re right. If I try to think of the contents of my blog, I’ll see how you arrived at that conclusion so there’s no way that I’ll dismiss your opinion without figuring out whether it’s valid or not. I, myself, hope that you’re wrong because I prefer not to think of myself as a deep person. However, I think we all know that’s not true. Also, I feel that it’s not entirely possible for me to think deeply about the things I talk about unless I have some emotional drive behind it. Sure, I’m as emotional as all of you but I guess I have my feelings under lock and key. It’s only so often that I let them out. Too bad none of you have been around to witness those. Then again, it might be a good thing.
Sorry for the misconception I gave in my last blog. I didn’t mean to say that you won’t have anything to say. Rather I meant that you wouldn’t say anything. I may not understand you completely and I think it’s the same with many people but I do know that you’re a thinker. I’m sure you have several ideas while you read over whatever I say but you tend not to express them.
We all know why I got the blog. So I could take a big swing at “Hyper Dude”. A part of me probably wanted the blog to use it as an outlet. I guess the time had arrived for me to finally start airing out my thoughts. I could even be using them to convince a large number of people to look at things from my point of view.
As for getting the comments, I don’t think it’s because I enjoy getting the feedback (thought I do enjoy knowing about the stir they cause). Instead, I think it’s because I want the feedback written out rather than in person. Yeah yeah, I know that I said I prefer oral communication but I also said that I prefer not to talk about my blogs. Sure, if it’s important or the reader wishes to express something deeper to me, then I welcome their oral feedback.
Yeah, I restarted my blogs to ‘satisfy’ my readers. But it was to satisfy me too. I’m a bookworm at heart and without any decent books around, I find myself penning my own. I’m not saying that this will become a book but it gives my creative side (and imagination) some exercise.
Yeah, you’re fishing around. However, you’re at the right pond. It is prime fishing season and you’ve struck it rich. Except you’re sleeping. I’m not saying you’re blind to what’s going on and are missing the point. Rather, I ‘m saying that you came so close and just went off-track slightly.
What was the point of your post? I don’t really know. What was the point of my post? Well, in my opinion, it was just another normal one. I didn’t feel anything changed in the contents except that perhaps I explored a few more sensitive areas.
I would love to spend a few hours with a psychologist. I’ve no professional training but I think I could hold up my end of the conversation. Unless he starts using technical terms in which case, I’ll go to a psychiatrist and see how long it takes him to pronounce me ‘mentally unstable’ after having the same conversation with him too..
Like you, I don’t care much for the opinions or judgements of others. *Just saying that made me wonder why I’m spending time trying to correct your opinions (I also know that none ‘cept you and possibly “Puff” (because she loves picking at my mistakes) would have noticed)* I don’t even bother knowing what’s going on in the world so I’m hardly qualified to talk about world events. I write about what I do during the week simply to keep the general atmosphere of my blog light. I don’t like reading my own blogs. (I can almost imagine the reactions of a few readers (especially “Hyper Dude”) . I can’t exactly describe what they’re like. It’s like saying “DUH!”. Well not really. More like when one thinks “THEN WHY!?!? Why write them like that?” (I doubt “Hyper Dude” thought of the last question)) I can’t really think why I’m doing this then. Perhaps I do care what others think. Or perhaps I just want to help you finish what you started.
You said that “In the world I choose to live in – these are not the critical factors that run my life.” By these, you were referring to the world and to the people are around you. I wrote something similar. “People live for the world – I want the world to live for me.” I don’t care what goes on in the world. Rather, I want MY world to be about those things that I do care about. I want to know about those things that affect me and it is this which directs my thinking patterns. Those are the things to me that you say are ‘bigger’.
It is true that I choose niceness and I know that I’m capable of not being ‘nice’. However, my character is now heavily integrated with ‘niceness’. I don’t want to see people fail at whatever they do and I don’t want to see people suffer. If I’m planning on moving forward, I want to take people with me. Not so that I’m alone at the end but so that those who wanted to understand me finally know what I was talking about.
One point that I think I understand but want clarification upon is when you said “It’s why he needs to reiterate that he doesn’t care if someone has a problem with him and his blog.” It strikes me as obvious that you’re saying that I always talk about how I’m impervious to the opinions of others simply because I’m not going to let them deter me from my main focus – Understanding the bigger picture. Not the picture that the world painted for me but the one that I’m part of. The picture that I paint to suit me rather than adapt to. However, the shallower side of me wants to know that you didn’t mean to say that I should reiterate that ‘fact’ again.
Neither you nor I have an idea as to what it is that we’re trying to find an answer to. I feel that I’ve reached the same point of confusion that you have. (It’s almost like we reached a certain stage of enlightenment (now I’m talking like a monk) but does that mean that we’ve reached a stage where we answered simpler questions which opened the doors to more complex ones?) Don’t feel that I’m saying that I’m on the same wavelength as you. I think that we’re both trying to figure out the solution to the same question but we’re at different stages of getting to the solution. Also, I think (at this point, I’m not ‘sure’ of much) that on your way to getting to wherever you are, you discovered solutions to ‘other questions’ that I’m not yet aware of. I feel like I’m taking something away from you since you’ve spent so long rationalising and now I’m saying that I’m at the same point you are.
People scoff at the ideas and beliefs of others simply because they don’t want to think outside the box that they’re so comfortable in. I’m just restating what you said. My explaining to people why I wrote all this and why I think like this will be useless. My mum will probably want to tell me that I shouldn’t worry about things like these since I’m not meant to worry about them nor am I supposed to try to understand them. I suppose I’m expected to be a proper civilian of the world and do what everyone else does.
That’s what I don’t like. Conformation – Adapting to the world by becoming what society expects of you. I’m not saying that I’ll favour anarchy or will become a rebel. What I want to say is that uniqueness is something that we should cherish and not pass up simply because we don’t want society to think we’re weirdoes.
The silence that often accompanies me when all around me are talking loudly is simply because I don’t want to say anything to them which will either dampen their mood or cause an argument that neither will win. I listen to what they say and but I think about completely unrelated topics. It’s only every so often that I offer my two cents in the conversation and that’s normally to make a sarcastic comment. It’s almost like my sarcasm is there to say “You idiots… you’re just not thinking the right way” (I prefer “I’m sir-rounded by eee-deee-ots” but the first line was the first thought that entered my mind) which would mean I’m condescending and considering myself to be superior to them. However, I feel that I’m just hoping to have a few more answers so that I can finally tell people that they should spend some time thinking about some of the things that I do. When they get stuck and ask me, I hope to have the answers to help them along. The problem that I keep running into is the barrage of questions that continuously pop up.
People who have read my blogs will picture me sitting down in silence and just thinking. Thinking about anything and everything. That’s not what I do. I don’t spend my time thinking about anything. Rather, when a topic enters my mind, I analyse it as much as I can to get all the information out of it. Then I pass it off. I don’t sit and hope for a topic to arrive. I go about my life and let the topic show itself. I talk about how I want to take charge. Well, I’m taking charge in this case by letting the topic expose itself instead of searching for it. For when the topic pops up, I’ll be waiting for it ready to pick the answer out. Bwahahahaha!
Oh “Hyper Dude”. I was impressed today when you were talking about what you expected me to do regarding further university studies. Whether I’ll change majors or not. You were pretty convinced at the time that I was going to switch and even though you asked me about it since then, I doubt you changed your opinion. You said that I was a determined man and was going to follow up on the course switch. Yeah, I am determined and I am going to follow up on the switch. I was surprised you got this far but then again it was mainly because I didn’t expect you to talk about me. (I can’t keep giving you credit. Had to take something away) I guess I never thought that other people would want to talk about me. This is where you hit a dead end. Sure I’m going through all those steps. Like you, I don’t want to stop taking engineering. It’ll make me think that I’ve given up. I could have given up years ago and let myself fall back a year so that I’ll be with others my age. I could have given up and not let myself reach the point that I am at now. Yet, why should I look at giving up as a mistake? Sometimes, letting the offense advance far enough is better than standing ground and fighting. It’s like setting up an ambush. If I let my pride stop me from giving up then I could just be fighting a losing battle. If I retreat for now, I could give myself a chance. I’m all for going back to engineering but I want to consider my options. If I’m determined then I’m determined to move forward. I’m not determined to make things easier for myself. Rather, I want the challenge to overcome.
I don’t run from losing battles unless it’s the best thing to do. I’ve picked many fights (a few which degraded into physical ones) that I knew I would lose but went ahead with anyway, simply because of the statement I make when I let the opposition and the other people know that I won’t stand idly by and let wrong (in my eyes) prevail. You guys asked me if I’ll pick a fight with Omar. If he does something that I feel I need to stand up for, I will stand up to him. If he wants to beat me down for that, that’s up to him. However, my point will have been made.
“Beware the fury of a patient man – John Dryden”. Believe me, they don’t come much more patient than me. That is why I would be good at ambushes or sniping. Haha, that last sentence is probably getting all the defense agencies to check up on me and mark me down as a potential future threat. Well, you guys can go suck eggs because I shall one day become famous! If that doesn’t work, I’ll be infamous. I shall one day become known. “Not for fame and money but known for being there.”
“Froggie”, (the artist formerly known as “Bandit”) no offense if I give you a black rose. Or if I change my mind and I decide to leave a dead rat under your pillow.
I can’t believe that even my blogs which are supposed to be an outlet for my thinking are being censored too. I admit that I had been treading on thin ice but I was kind of enjoying that. Still, spoilsports are always there to dampen my fun. On the bright side, they can stop me from making mistakes.
LIMU! LIMU! LIMU!
“Powerpuff”, you’ve joined the whining ranks under the rule of “Hyper Dude”. I say to you the same thing I said to “Hyper Dude”. If my blogs are too long for you to read in one go, then you can either not read them or just read them in portions. Instead of whining about the problem, why don’t you ‘take the initiative’ (like “Hyper Dude” likes to say)? Figure out the solution! In case, you’re still stumped as to what the solution is, read the sentence starting from “If my blogs…” to “them in portions” again. Maybe that will give you a hint.
Ok, “Banana Man” had a fairly long blog devoted to an analysis of me. I don’t know why you did that but I really don’t mind. It’s kind of interesting knowing what you think of me since I always thought that on a deeper mental level, you and I were quite similar (I’m sure I’m going to hear a lot of dumb jokes about those last few words). I’m going to give you a few confirmations and a few quantifications of your words. I think you expected this but didn’t really want it. I’ll try not to assume anything on your behalf.
True, I don’t use MSN anymore (except on rare occasions) like many now know. I completely understand that people might prefer not to e-mail me, phone me or visit me in person. However, I don’t mind that. Sure, I receive phone calls from others for the simplest things which normally would be expressed over MSN but I still prefer the phone for such cases. People always judged me as one of those people who preferred MSN since I could express myself more freely that way. However, I like the personal touch that phone calls and meetings have, which written communications can’t provide.
You were right that we’re using our blogs to communicate most of the time. However, I have the impression that none of us are supposed to discuss our blogs in person. I don’t really know why, but it’s just a viewpoint that I hold. Even then, I’m often the person who brings up the other’s blog. Perhaps my viewpoint only applies to those who ruminate in their blogs rather than talk about day-to-day life.
I don’t know whether the whole thing “‘stinks’ of a man trying to understand what he is and why.”. I tend to do that sort of thinking personally, without letting the general public know. However, it’s entirely possible that you’re right. If I try to think of the contents of my blog, I’ll see how you arrived at that conclusion so there’s no way that I’ll dismiss your opinion without figuring out whether it’s valid or not. I, myself, hope that you’re wrong because I prefer not to think of myself as a deep person. However, I think we all know that’s not true. Also, I feel that it’s not entirely possible for me to think deeply about the things I talk about unless I have some emotional drive behind it. Sure, I’m as emotional as all of you but I guess I have my feelings under lock and key. It’s only so often that I let them out. Too bad none of you have been around to witness those. Then again, it might be a good thing.
Sorry for the misconception I gave in my last blog. I didn’t mean to say that you won’t have anything to say. Rather I meant that you wouldn’t say anything. I may not understand you completely and I think it’s the same with many people but I do know that you’re a thinker. I’m sure you have several ideas while you read over whatever I say but you tend not to express them.
We all know why I got the blog. So I could take a big swing at “Hyper Dude”. A part of me probably wanted the blog to use it as an outlet. I guess the time had arrived for me to finally start airing out my thoughts. I could even be using them to convince a large number of people to look at things from my point of view.
As for getting the comments, I don’t think it’s because I enjoy getting the feedback (thought I do enjoy knowing about the stir they cause). Instead, I think it’s because I want the feedback written out rather than in person. Yeah yeah, I know that I said I prefer oral communication but I also said that I prefer not to talk about my blogs. Sure, if it’s important or the reader wishes to express something deeper to me, then I welcome their oral feedback.
Yeah, I restarted my blogs to ‘satisfy’ my readers. But it was to satisfy me too. I’m a bookworm at heart and without any decent books around, I find myself penning my own. I’m not saying that this will become a book but it gives my creative side (and imagination) some exercise.
Yeah, you’re fishing around. However, you’re at the right pond. It is prime fishing season and you’ve struck it rich. Except you’re sleeping. I’m not saying you’re blind to what’s going on and are missing the point. Rather, I ‘m saying that you came so close and just went off-track slightly.
What was the point of your post? I don’t really know. What was the point of my post? Well, in my opinion, it was just another normal one. I didn’t feel anything changed in the contents except that perhaps I explored a few more sensitive areas.
I would love to spend a few hours with a psychologist. I’ve no professional training but I think I could hold up my end of the conversation. Unless he starts using technical terms in which case, I’ll go to a psychiatrist and see how long it takes him to pronounce me ‘mentally unstable’ after having the same conversation with him too..
Like you, I don’t care much for the opinions or judgements of others. *Just saying that made me wonder why I’m spending time trying to correct your opinions (I also know that none ‘cept you and possibly “Puff” (because she loves picking at my mistakes) would have noticed)* I don’t even bother knowing what’s going on in the world so I’m hardly qualified to talk about world events. I write about what I do during the week simply to keep the general atmosphere of my blog light. I don’t like reading my own blogs. (I can almost imagine the reactions of a few readers (especially “Hyper Dude”) . I can’t exactly describe what they’re like. It’s like saying “DUH!”. Well not really. More like when one thinks “THEN WHY!?!? Why write them like that?” (I doubt “Hyper Dude” thought of the last question)) I can’t really think why I’m doing this then. Perhaps I do care what others think. Or perhaps I just want to help you finish what you started.
You said that “In the world I choose to live in – these are not the critical factors that run my life.” By these, you were referring to the world and to the people are around you. I wrote something similar. “People live for the world – I want the world to live for me.” I don’t care what goes on in the world. Rather, I want MY world to be about those things that I do care about. I want to know about those things that affect me and it is this which directs my thinking patterns. Those are the things to me that you say are ‘bigger’.
It is true that I choose niceness and I know that I’m capable of not being ‘nice’. However, my character is now heavily integrated with ‘niceness’. I don’t want to see people fail at whatever they do and I don’t want to see people suffer. If I’m planning on moving forward, I want to take people with me. Not so that I’m alone at the end but so that those who wanted to understand me finally know what I was talking about.
One point that I think I understand but want clarification upon is when you said “It’s why he needs to reiterate that he doesn’t care if someone has a problem with him and his blog.” It strikes me as obvious that you’re saying that I always talk about how I’m impervious to the opinions of others simply because I’m not going to let them deter me from my main focus – Understanding the bigger picture. Not the picture that the world painted for me but the one that I’m part of. The picture that I paint to suit me rather than adapt to. However, the shallower side of me wants to know that you didn’t mean to say that I should reiterate that ‘fact’ again.
Neither you nor I have an idea as to what it is that we’re trying to find an answer to. I feel that I’ve reached the same point of confusion that you have. (It’s almost like we reached a certain stage of enlightenment (now I’m talking like a monk) but does that mean that we’ve reached a stage where we answered simpler questions which opened the doors to more complex ones?) Don’t feel that I’m saying that I’m on the same wavelength as you. I think that we’re both trying to figure out the solution to the same question but we’re at different stages of getting to the solution. Also, I think (at this point, I’m not ‘sure’ of much) that on your way to getting to wherever you are, you discovered solutions to ‘other questions’ that I’m not yet aware of. I feel like I’m taking something away from you since you’ve spent so long rationalising and now I’m saying that I’m at the same point you are.
People scoff at the ideas and beliefs of others simply because they don’t want to think outside the box that they’re so comfortable in. I’m just restating what you said. My explaining to people why I wrote all this and why I think like this will be useless. My mum will probably want to tell me that I shouldn’t worry about things like these since I’m not meant to worry about them nor am I supposed to try to understand them. I suppose I’m expected to be a proper civilian of the world and do what everyone else does.
That’s what I don’t like. Conformation – Adapting to the world by becoming what society expects of you. I’m not saying that I’ll favour anarchy or will become a rebel. What I want to say is that uniqueness is something that we should cherish and not pass up simply because we don’t want society to think we’re weirdoes.
The silence that often accompanies me when all around me are talking loudly is simply because I don’t want to say anything to them which will either dampen their mood or cause an argument that neither will win. I listen to what they say and but I think about completely unrelated topics. It’s only every so often that I offer my two cents in the conversation and that’s normally to make a sarcastic comment. It’s almost like my sarcasm is there to say “You idiots… you’re just not thinking the right way” (I prefer “I’m sir-rounded by eee-deee-ots” but the first line was the first thought that entered my mind) which would mean I’m condescending and considering myself to be superior to them. However, I feel that I’m just hoping to have a few more answers so that I can finally tell people that they should spend some time thinking about some of the things that I do. When they get stuck and ask me, I hope to have the answers to help them along. The problem that I keep running into is the barrage of questions that continuously pop up.
People who have read my blogs will picture me sitting down in silence and just thinking. Thinking about anything and everything. That’s not what I do. I don’t spend my time thinking about anything. Rather, when a topic enters my mind, I analyse it as much as I can to get all the information out of it. Then I pass it off. I don’t sit and hope for a topic to arrive. I go about my life and let the topic show itself. I talk about how I want to take charge. Well, I’m taking charge in this case by letting the topic expose itself instead of searching for it. For when the topic pops up, I’ll be waiting for it ready to pick the answer out. Bwahahahaha!
Oh “Hyper Dude”. I was impressed today when you were talking about what you expected me to do regarding further university studies. Whether I’ll change majors or not. You were pretty convinced at the time that I was going to switch and even though you asked me about it since then, I doubt you changed your opinion. You said that I was a determined man and was going to follow up on the course switch. Yeah, I am determined and I am going to follow up on the switch. I was surprised you got this far but then again it was mainly because I didn’t expect you to talk about me. (I can’t keep giving you credit. Had to take something away) I guess I never thought that other people would want to talk about me. This is where you hit a dead end. Sure I’m going through all those steps. Like you, I don’t want to stop taking engineering. It’ll make me think that I’ve given up. I could have given up years ago and let myself fall back a year so that I’ll be with others my age. I could have given up and not let myself reach the point that I am at now. Yet, why should I look at giving up as a mistake? Sometimes, letting the offense advance far enough is better than standing ground and fighting. It’s like setting up an ambush. If I let my pride stop me from giving up then I could just be fighting a losing battle. If I retreat for now, I could give myself a chance. I’m all for going back to engineering but I want to consider my options. If I’m determined then I’m determined to move forward. I’m not determined to make things easier for myself. Rather, I want the challenge to overcome.
I don’t run from losing battles unless it’s the best thing to do. I’ve picked many fights (a few which degraded into physical ones) that I knew I would lose but went ahead with anyway, simply because of the statement I make when I let the opposition and the other people know that I won’t stand idly by and let wrong (in my eyes) prevail. You guys asked me if I’ll pick a fight with Omar. If he does something that I feel I need to stand up for, I will stand up to him. If he wants to beat me down for that, that’s up to him. However, my point will have been made.
“Beware the fury of a patient man – John Dryden”. Believe me, they don’t come much more patient than me. That is why I would be good at ambushes or sniping. Haha, that last sentence is probably getting all the defense agencies to check up on me and mark me down as a potential future threat. Well, you guys can go suck eggs because I shall one day become famous! If that doesn’t work, I’ll be infamous. I shall one day become known. “Not for fame and money but known for being there.”
