Etiquettes Schmetiquettes!

Let me first give you time to untwist your tongue after reading that title! And in the case of "Froggie", check the meaning of the first word and be given ample time to figure out that the second word doesn't exist.
 
Sorry dearie, just had to take that shot!
 
Alright, what's up? Well, work is going fine. Classes are going fine. Life is great!
 
I'm sure we've all read that e-mail on urinal etiquette about which urinal to occupy (or not occupy) depending on the circumstances. I'd like to add to that. No matter how urgent, no matter how full the bladder, no matter how quickly you're losing control (enough details?), should you rush to occupy a urinal which was just vacated even if there is no one else waiting in line. Don't ask me why... it's just something you shouldn't do. Try it yourself and let me know if it feels right.
 
Phew! Feels good to get that off my adonis-like chest! Now... what else?
 
Haha! The computer classes I've been taking have a whole bunch of computers connected on a network. So it should come as no surprise that I've been messing around with the computers of the other students. Bear in mind, they are all working men aged 30 and above.
 
There they are, merrily typing away, running a series of programs when "wattzis? My computer just restarted!" or "Huh? I just got logged out" or "The computer just opened a new window filled with comments making fun of me!". And there I am at the back of the class, holding back waves of laughter and trying to remove all trace that I did anything at all!
 
Don't you "tut-tut!" me! It's the only way I can stay awake in the class! I just keep drifting off... Lack of sleep and an abundance of boring lectures do that to a person! Even coffee is useless!
 
Oh! I finally figured out why coffee helps people stay awake. It's not the caffeine... it's the shock that accompanies a burnt tongue!
 
Man! Course enrollment is tough! There's no way that I can pick one course! Uff! And those artsies think that they've got it rough! TCH! Yeah, that's right... I just said "TCH"
 
Inspiration!!! -> "Tch" is just a sound effect we make when we're exasperated... I just realised its origin. It's desi (Ok, own up... which one of you lot started singing "Show me the meaning of being desi!"?) and what's more... it stands for something. Something we all want to say to "Frenchie" whenever we see him. "Tum C*****ya Ho" ROFL
 
By the way, "Lone Ranger", since you're really bored staying at home, why don't you take control of wooing "Frenchie" with the 'special' MSN account? However, take your time. I know you'll need a few minutes to vacate Mike's knot! Ooh! Dis!
 
Ok, to be serious for a moment, who the hell is 'we' and "what the hell, yaar?" Ah wait, that's "Midas"' line. Who is we and what is it that you guys think you know that I should be telling you? I have no idea what's going on! In the words of the ever-so eloquent "Artsie", "ALL MY FRIENDS ARE ***"
 
Hmm, I think I need to change the layout of the page. This dark format is disheartening. I need something more perky and peppy with a touch of pizazz! I want... *And Pink is my favourite colour!...*
 
Oh! I went go-karting with my cousin. Karts that go up to 90 kph. Karts that skid like crazy when you don't use brakes on sharp turns! Karts that squeeze all the fat out of you (sniff! I lost whatever little fat I had) But they were AWESOME! Soooo much fun zipping around in a little kart though it bruised me in several places because of the cramped quarters. I was so stiff afterwards that it was hard to move around afterwards. Still! I'm going again on Thursday hopefully!
 
Bah, class time and I need to go take a tinkle on a cake... a urinal cake that is... ooh, too many details again?

Working It!

Let me start off by wishing "Puff" farewell officially... i.e. writing it here so that it's on record. Let it also be stated that I wished her farewell on the tag-board on the night of the 16th! However, this time, I actually told her personally too unlike what I did on her birthday. *smacks myself*
 
"Artsie"... you're right. Pakistan has changed so much. However, there's no place like home and "damn! it feels good to be a ga.. Pakistani" Can't have as much fun anywhere else. I wish I was going to university in Pakistan now... however, because of the stupid Canadian passport, I'm going to keep attending U of T. 
 
I've got a semi-internship. I'm taking these classes for Red Hat Linux worth $4000 for free but at the same time, I'm doing an internship at GBM (IBM's distributor in the Gulf). Been doing it for almost two weeks now. I hate not getting enough sleep. I don't go to sleep before 4 and my dad wakes me up at 7. I would have slept through half my classes if it wasn't for the miracles of coffee.
 
Speaking of coffee, I think I've finally developed a taste for hot drinks... Well, just one in particular... Mochaccino! Then again, I think even coffee would taste good if it's got three spoons of sugar in it.

Haha! My instructor this week is hilarious! He's really good and all but he's from Southern India. He says Yem instead of M, Yef instead of F, Yii instead of I, You instead of U... wait that works! Still... He was just writing down the e-mail of a student, Yay, Yem, Yo, R, something something....

Ok, can't say much since my class is starting in a few minutes. Just wanted to post something so that people besides "Artsie" knew I was still alive.
 
Oh! "Puff", you'll be proud of me! I actually believe in permanent friendships now. I also believe in the Tooth Fairy, Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny (especially the last one since he made a lovely meal). I hope no kids read this blog. Seriously, I do believe in it now. I'm so proud of myself. I also believe in unconditional amour. You know me... I don't believe it until I experience it. I remember (yet another thing that I've remembered) telling you that I would tell you all the details soon. I guess I'll have to e-mail them to you. I'm looking forward to hearing what you have to say.
 
On a different sort of note, completely out of my current character, I must warn all you 'Nutters that I've got a lot of pent-up rage and am so close to snapping at anyone and everyone. So, in all fairness, I think you guys deserve a warning. Warning - You'll be better off if you avoid me for all of next year. Did I say that's a warning? I meant it as a threat.
 
I've got so much to say but nothing meaningless enough to write down. I'm saving it all for the e-mail to "Puff" the Sweetie! Haha! My mum's still after you "Puff"! She wants to 'give you a tight slap' for being so 'crack'! Haha! How dare you talk to me for 5 hours all night? Shame on you! How dare I think of going to the airport to meet you but not go to meet relatives? Shame on me! How dare I ask my father to drop me off at the Sharjah (Yes, I said "Sharjah") airport? CRACK!!
 
I haven't liked my uncle having my cell phone one bit. He kept intercepting all of my calls and all of my messages and I didn't get to know about any of them until much later. However, now that you're gone, I don't seem to care who calls or who messages. He comes home and said I got a message and I'm like whoopie! I'll check it whenever I'm within arm's reach of the cell phone. With you, not only did I find the cell phone and call you back or whatever, I even spent several hours sitting next to a washing machine!!! I even listened to you hum the Pink Panther theme as you stalked Sleeping Beauty ("Punchoo")
 
Oh, to the rest... half of my words are inside jokes so don't go judging me! Unless you've got one of those white wigs! Then judge away!

Bah! Nothing else to say. Life's so appealing to me these days even though nothing's going to my liking. I spend 11 hours a day in the office, 2 hours sleeping and the rest of the time surrounded by cousins at home who are always vying to see who I'll snap at first! Oh joy! Another cousin's coming today! My house is now playing home to 12 people!! Oh the inhumanity! Oh the suffering! Kill me now! Wait... don't! I've got too much to live for. Well, mainly two people but that's enough to keep me going! Haha, "Puff", how's the musho-meter?

Bah!

Pissed... Not Really

ARGH! The pains of trying to send one simple SMS message from my computer to a cell phone in Pakistan! I hope she appreciates the effort I’m making! ARGH! *door falls down*

Comprehension

I finally realised how to describe myself. I’m a typical adolescent who’s just a bit more unattached, observant and determined than normal. The main difference between others and me is that I’m very aware of what is going on with me as well as being aware of what’s going on around me.